Don't know what went wrong. When I told that story to Mark, he seemed to like it a lot. 'Course it was a whole different world back in '56. Maybe kids were different also. When he read the pig story to his grandkids they seemed to like it alright but only alright. Maybe it was too convoluted. Maybe too much an adult version of a fair tale. Well, that's what it was supposed to be. Could be that's why I liked it more than they did. On the other hand, maybe the story just sucked. Either way, it's got me puzzled.
The answer to my puzzle? I sat next to my grandson this morning and asked him. Right off he said, "Too many names." Simple enough. After first mentioning a name in Hawaiian, I went back to English for the remainder of the tale. 'Spose there's a lot more problems where that one came from.
Friday, November 28, 2014
Tuesday, November 18, 2014
Uncle Emil and the Hawaiian Pigs
I don't know where this story will go. Maybe nowhere. I don't usually think out a story beyond having general idea as to topic. As usual it all depends on my Uncle Emil. The way I see it, if he knew how to use a laptop, he could be writing this story by himself. Seeing as how his invisible fingers can't work the keyboard, I guess it's up to me to hunt and peck. Seems a bit odd having a middle-aged man as a muse but if that's the way it is…. Oddly enough, my uncle's been around helping me make up stuff since I was a kid, I just didn't know it and wasn't all that good at opening up to let the man have his say. He must have felt frustrated or maybe he was simply patient, willing to bide his time for a few decades.
Anyhow, the other day two of my grandchildren called up to wish me a happy Veteran's Day. I have a hard time with those kind of things. Too many conflicting emotions dance around in my head and none are comprehensible to a six and eight year old. So I'm stuck with a simple 'thank you'. Actually there is something happy about being a veteran. That being I'm no longer in the Army and humping the boonies of Vietnam or having to deal with an alcoholic with stripes (except maybe in my head now and then).
Talking with Mollie and Jakob on the phone takes some effort on my part. Neither ventures much information on their own and it's up to me to either pepper them with questions or set to babbling on about whatever comes into my head. Finally, my son-in-law Ryan came to the rescue and I voiced my dilemma about Mollie and Jakob's silence. His answer was simple, "They're waiting for Uncle Emil stories", or something like that. Got me thinking and led to the idea that maybe Emil and I could sit down and spin us a yarn about my grandkids.
Back a few dozen entries Emil churned out something on Rapunzel. Not bad but could have been better, more polished. Not really his fault as he was driving and only blurted it out to pass the time on a long, long drive with a kid who was just as hard a nut to crack as the children of today. We'll see if we can do better the second time.
First off the story has to be about Jakob and Mollie. Good enough. Then off the story bounced into the world of princes and princesses. Made me nauseous and bored Uncle Emil. Today the tale drifted overseas to Hawaii. Emil thought that had potential. Next we needed animals. Animals that might have been in the islands before us white guys showed up. The choice for fairy tale animals was limited. No lions or tigers or bears in Hawaii. But we figured, why not pigs, wild pigs with big, nasty tusks? Thumbs up from Emil even though he said there wasn't a pig within a thousand miles of Hawaii before people showed up. A couple more suggestions came along from Uncle Emil but I won't let those cats out till I start to peckin' tomorrow.
Uncle Emil always said there was no need being in a hurry when you were off on an adventure or a had a tale to tell. You don't want to miss a moment of a good thing. I was nine or ten at the time and we were sitting in his red, fifteen foot Lund fishing boat with the ten horse Johnson mounted on back. You're probably thinking we were out fishing. If you are, you're wrong. In fact it was the dead of winter in the north land. Up in St. Bruno, Minnesota, winter means knee-deep snow, below zero temperatures and a howling wind out of the northwest. Emil said the wind smelled like Alaska with a whiff of Canada thrown in for good measure. Had we actually been fishing we'd have been out on the lake peering down a hole in the ice hoping we'd catch something quick so we could run off to someplace warm. Like maybe Wessel's Tap in downtown Parkers Prairie. There, my uncle would sip a couple of Grain Belt's and get me a coke with a fistful of cherries thrown in.
No, at the moment we were in his garage. He and my Aunt Lena live in a small, single story, stucco and brick house just outside of town. The house may have been small but not the garage. In fact it was closer in size to a small barn. Half held their two cars. The remainder was Emil's workshop. In the winter months his shop shared its space with his boat 'Silent but Deadly'. Though it was bitter cold outside, in the workshop it was somewhat tolerable for he'd built a cement block fireplace and had it stoked up and glowing.
In his shop Uncle Emil built everything from birdhouses to dining room tables. "I do my best to build things as good as a craftsmen but usually fall a few yards short. My Danish Modern tends to border on rustic. Ah well, at least it looks pretty. Mark my words it'll be worth a lot of money someday as what they call Folk Art. Truth is, it doesn't much matter since I give it all away."
Earlier in the month he and my Aunt Lena had returned from two weeks in Hawaii. It wasn't their first trip to the islands and wouldn't be their last. To them Hawaii felt like a home away from home. "It's got woods and water just like Minnesota. Can't go wrong with that combination. Also has mountains, good food, smells nice and eighty above in January isn't near as bad for your soul as most Minnesotans would think."
On the plane ride back, Emil had plenty of time to kick around the back corners of his brain to see what he could find. As he put it, "While mullin' things over, I tripped over a mental rock 'cause I was wearin' a fancy pair of high heeled cowboy boots. Not a smart thing to have on your feet when traipsin' through an imaginary rain forest. Anyhow, while I was layin' there feeling pretty darn foolish, this story jumped on me out of nowhere and wouldn't let loose till I heard it out. So that's how the story of 'The Hawaiian Pigs' came about. You may like it and then again, you might think it's whole lot of malarkey. Remember, I didn't make it up, so it's not my fault if it smells a bit overcooked here and there. Lucky for me I had a couple of books with me on Hawaiian language so I didn't have to fake names of places. There's a whole world of difference between fake and fiction. When you go to spinning a yarn, keep it as real as you can."
Before climbing in the Lund, Emil walked over to the rack where he stored his fishing gear. "Couple of times every week I head into the workshop just to wiggle a rod or two. Let's me remember the bend of a fish on the line. Helps to get me through the months of ice."
At least a dozen rods filled the rack. All were the white of Shakespeare. "Don't go in for the real fancy rods. These Shakespeare rods seem a better fit in the hand of a man who swings a hammer now and then."
But that wasn't what he was after. Alongside the rack sat a tall, narrow, oak cabinet. From a drawer Uncle Emil pulled a wooden cigar box, "Got this box from a cigar shop in Miami for a quarter. She's not fancy but does the job just right." Inside was a pack of Lucky Strike cigarettes and a Zippo lighter. He pulled a single smoke and we climbed up into the boat.
Emil packed his lone Lucky on the Zippo, fired up it up and while he smoked said, "Had this lighter on me when I was shot in the Philippines. We were clearin' out the last of the Japanese resistance a few months before the end of the war. The area we were patrolling was a known hot spot and we were expecting to get hit. Anyhow, the bullet went in here (pointed to his left shoulder) and came out here (right side of his neck). Next thing I recall I was in the hospital. Long, long time ago. I keep the lighter to remind me how good I've had it ever since."
" 'Bout the only time I smoke these days is when I'm in a boat. A pack'll last me into spring. A carton, a year or more."
"So, while Lena and I were flying back from Honolulu the story of the Hawaiian pigs came calling more than once. And I set to ruminating over it like a cow. Chewed it up, swallowed it down, let it sit for a while then'd pull the cud up again to chew on it some more. Archie me lad, you ever pass this story on, feel free to change any of the names you want. Anyhow, here she goes."
The Hawaiian Pigs
A long, long time ago, way before people landed in the Hawaiian Islands, back in the days when animals walked on their hind legs just like in Walt Disney cartoons, there lived a race of pigs on Oahu, the island that's home to Honolulu these days. Odd thing was, those pigs spoke Hawaiian even before the Hawaiians spoke Hawaiian and they called themselves the Pua'a, which as you may or may not know, means pig. Me, I have a hard time sayin' words in Hawaiian. So, from now on I'll give you a name in Hawaiian then stick with the English if that's okay with you? Life was good for those pigs. Not only did they get to eat slop like pigs do today but even got to eat stuff before it was one step from the trash can. You see, food was growing everywhere, the pigs were good cooks and the weather was fine, in fact it was the best on the planet. Air was clean, so was the water. The pigs had figured out surfing and when the waves were up, they spent their time at the beach. Not a worry in the world.
Up on the north shore of Oahu there's a bay by the name of Waimea. Big waves crash in that bay all winter long and not far away, up the beach a little, was some of the best surfing in the world. Not only some but all of the best in the world seein' as how the Pigs were the only ones who'd figured out how to ride a board and hang four. They'd have hung ten like the surfers in California but were short a few toes.
The pigs this story's about lived in a kind of village, they called it an ahupua'a and gave it the name of Waimea, just like the bay and the deep valley behind it. Where the valley ended at the big waterfall, it rose up into the mountains surrounding it on three sides. In those mountains the forest grew tall and dark, dark as the bottom of a coal miner's boot in the middle of moonless night. Spooky as all get out. It was said ghosts wandered those woods. All the pigs were just a little bit nervous whenever they climbed into the mountains. As a result, they tended to stay down below as much as they could. Did I say they hadn't a worry in the world? Guess I was wrong.
On all the north shore of the island the two best surfers were Moli Malia (Mollie Marie)Pua'a and her brother Iakopa Dini (Jakob Dean) Pua'a. In fact, all the villagers had the last name of Pua'a. Heck, they were pigs and none to creative. Seein' as how there were only a couple of dozen Pua'a in the whole village there really wasn't any need for last names. So, from this point on we'll stick with first names only. Okay?
When the big waves of winter thundered in, Jakob and Mollie rode only the tallest, meanest and toughest. Ordinary ten footers just weren't fun enough. When they were looking to simply goof around with their friends, they'd head up the beach to a spot where the waves rolled in as near perfect tubes. On those days the entire village would turn out to watch their feats. None but Mollie and Jakob were brave enough to paddle far from the shore to the place where they caught the largest of the sets. Then, with shouts of encouragement from the crowd, Mollie would ride in doing a one hoofed, foreleg stand till the wave closed out and crashed behind her in an explosion of foam. Not to be outdone, Jakob would ride the next while standing on his head. Not bad for a couple of very young pigs. My brother Ed raises pigs and I've never seen a one of them do anything more challenging then fit a head of lettuce and two apples into its mouth at the same time.
It was on one of those winter days while the entire village was out watching Mollie and Jakob, that it happened. Somehow, someway, every hut and storage building in Waimea had been knocked down and scattered everywhere. Seeing as how the dozen houses in the village were all made of grass, rebuilding only took a few days. But the cause was a mystery to everyone. The little village had been destroyed several times before but each was the result of a hurricane. This time the weather had been beautiful. Blue skies with puffy white clouds out on the ocean and the gentlest of breezes to cool the villagers when out in the sunlight. Certainly not the type of day to cause such destruction.
A meeting was called to discuss the issue and what to do about it. Some said it was the ghosts of the forest 'cause no one was paying enough attention to them. Other's said it was the gods getting even 'cause the last tribute offered them wasn't but a bunch of over ripe, almost mushy bananas.
Uncle Emil paused, "Speaking of too ripe, did I ever tell you about the idea I had to make cat food out of real mice and birds. Made sense to me seein' as how that's what cats seem to like when they're out on their own. So I made me up a batch and the barn cats over at Ed's sure seemed to like it a lot. It was Lena who put the kibosh on the deal. Said the mix smelled a little on the awful side. Had to admit she was right as I had to wear a gas mask when I mixed the mess together."
Where was I? Whatever the reason, it was agreed the next time the village headed up the beach, a guard would be left behind to see if the blowdown happened again and find out the cause. Kind of a scary job if you ask me. A volunteer was asked for. No one stepped forward so Pelekinako (Ferdinand) was chosen seein' as how he was the only one who hadn't shown up. There's a lesson to be learned there.
Ferdinand was a interesting choice and wasn't happy about having to face whatever it was he was going to have to face. Out of all the Pigs he was the strongest. And the gentlest. And the laziest. Whenever the time came to build a new fishing canoe he was always off somewhere else. Usually he'd be found under his favorite banyan tree where he liked to sit and smell the plumeria and hibiscus flowers. Got him out of a lot of work and, in this case, got him in a tight spot.
'Bout a week went by before the waves were just right for Jakob and Mollie to frolic in the surf once again. Most everyone pitched in to cook up a big picnic lunch and then they headed up the beach. All but Ferdinand that is. Yup, he was left behind to face the ghosts or the gods.
As usual everyone had a good time under blue skies and puffy white clouds. Mollie and Jakob were better than ever and the food was wonderful. However, much to their dismay, when they returned at the end of the day, the village was once again in shambles. And they were none the wiser as to what had happened 'cause Ferdinand was nowhere in sight. Fears that he'd been carried off by the ghosts or banished to the underworld by the gods flew rampant through the villagers. However, a search of the area found him under his favorite banyan tree, sound asleep and covered in flowers. Guess they chose the wrong pua'a, eh?
What to do? What to do? Two small time tragedies and not a clue as to what was going on. The Pigs searched everywhere for clues or footprints but, who or whatever it was, left none. For sure ghosts and gods wouldn't and that had all the Pigs shook up. Once again a volunteer was called for and this time the oldest, most shriveled up pig of them all, the old geezer Emela (Emil - funny how those things work out) stepped forward.
"Yup, this time you've got yourself one top notch, won't miss a thing, guard for this pile of straw. Next time the kids decide to head up the beach and show off, you guys go and have yourselves a good time. Not a thing to worry about back here. Odds are I'll not only find out who's making a misery of our huts but I'll solve the situation once and for all."
That Emil was one cocksure little bugger wasn't he? But he'd been a good worker all his life and usually had a fix that'd work whenever a problem popped up, so everyone was relieved.
For the next two weeks things again returned to normal. Unless, of course, you decided to get up in the middle of the night to relieve yourself. Long about three in the morning, if the riser listened just right, he or she could hear a grumbling, rumbling, growling sort of noise high above in the forest. They'd never heard anything like that before and a visit outside in the dark of the night became an act of courage. Most figured whatever was making that noise was also tearing down the village. Well, makes sense doesn't it?
It was nearing spring when some of the last big waves paid a visit. Though few of the villagers, including Jakob and Mollie, were in the mood to party, once again a feast was prepared and the day spent up the beach. Mollie and Jakob headed out in the surf as usual but their hearts just weren't in doing what they did best. Jakob even fell and cut his shoulder on the sharp reef beneath the curling waves. In short, no one had a good time and instead, stood around worrying about what might be happening back home.
The sun was near to setting when they returned. Once again the village was in shambles but this time Emil had seen everything, " Never seen anything like it before. Don't even know what they were. Big, hairy animals with long snouts, pointy teeth from one end of their mouths to the other and beady, little red eyes. So red they looked like they were on fire. Wasn't but two of the creatures that came running in on all fours. When they got inside the village, both stood up and commenced to destroying everything around them, all the while laughing and yelling stuff like 'Little pigs, little pigs, next time we come we'll eat you up.' but the oddest thing of all was how they knocked down our houses. They simply stood up tall as they could, sucked in an ocean of air and blew the huts down, one at a time."
"While this was going on I was hiding behind a cluster of coconut palms over by the beach. I'd gone out for a quick swim and was drying myself in the sun when the two of them stormed in. Yeah, I was scared alright, right down to my chops. No way was I running in there to try and stop them."
"About the time the last of the storage huts was going down, the shorter of the two stopped, stuck its snout in the air and said, 'Oh Elonu (that's Eldon in case you're wondering) stop a minute. Do you smell what I smell?' So Eldon stopped, stuck his nose up and replied, 'If you're smelling piggies Lali (that's Larry of course), then I'm right with you. Let's us go and find that piggy and maybe have us a little lunch, mmmmm, mmm.'
" Well, they found me all right. Lucky for them I wasn't in the mood to fight or the two of them would already be laid out as rugs. Instead, I figured it best to work out a deal. Wasn't easy since I was crying a lot 'cause I felt bad about not beating the tar out of the two of them. Anyhow, we agreed they'd consider not eating us all at the same time if we followed their instructions to a T. Guess they didn't trust me 'cause they wrote a message on my body."
The villagers looked Emil up and down but saw nary a word till he turned around and bent over. There on his little piggy backside was written the message:
TOMORROW NIGHT AS THE MOON RISES HIGHER
SEND US THREE PLUMP PIGGIES TO ROAST OVER OUR FIRE
THE 'ILIO HAE (wolves)
Wolves? What the heck are wolves asked all the pigs at once? I suppose the truth is, names don't always matter a lot. In a situation like this where everyone you knew could end up on someone else's table for Sunday dinner, it didn't matter a whit what the diners called themselves. What mattered at the moment was what to do about it. A brief discussion led to the decision to roll up in mats for the night and sleep on it. Maybe in the morning one of the pigs would come up with an idea that would save everyone's hides.
The sun rose in the morning as it always does. So did the villagers. While they ate their breakfast of breadfruit, poi and coconuts while sitting in the sand, the pigs talked over their dilemma. Seemed none had any fateful dreams in the night and had not a clue what to do. But not so Mollie and Jakob. Actually, their plan had nothing to do with a dream. While the others had been snoring away as only pigs can snore, the two of them had whispered together far into the night. Not only whispered but actually hatched an idea. They knew what they hoped to do was risky. Might even cost them everything. On the other hand, it might save all of the pigs. They figured it was worth a try.
It was Jakob who popped their plan to the village. Well, not all of the plan. Just enough to get the rest of the villagers off the hook. Not a one of them wanted to climb out of the valley in the middle of the night even if there wasn't a single wolf for a million miles. Who could blame them? It was dark up there and maybe filled with ghosts. So when our two heroes volunteered, a sigh of relief could be heard all the way out to Kaena Point.
"Mollie and I will go. We have an idea that might save the village. But, according to the note on Emil, we need one more volunteer. Someone brave, someone wise, someone all the world is in love with. Someone with a note written on his bottom."
That's how Emil found himself with our young heroes in the dark and climbing the steep cliff alongside the waterfall at the head of Waimea Valley. Thankfully the full moon had risen over the mountains and made the foot and hand holds easy to see. To say Emil was unhappy would be a grave understatement. He was unhappy to the point of being furious, furious to the point of becoming intelligent, and intelligent to the point of becoming wise. Finally, he'd become wise enough to know it was he who would have to do the talking.
Mollie and Jakob had told him of their plan as the three passed out of earshot from the village. Emil listened then said, "I have to tell you two kids that's the most hair-brained idea I've ever heard. In fact it's so crazy that, with a whole lot of luck, it just might work. Remember, you two have to keep your pie holes shut unless I ask you to talk. Agreed?" But the other two said nothing in return.
Not long after they'd scaled the cliff our heroes stumbled on the wolves. The pair was relaxing in hammocks they'd strung in a grove of nipa palms. When they saw the three pigs coming the two jumped out of their beds and Eldon started yelling, "What in the Sam Hill are you three losers doing up here! We wanted plump piggies not two skinny kids and a wrinkled old geezer. What kind of meal are you going to make? We're hungry, really hungry. Burns a lot of calories blowing down a village, even a cruddy little one like yours."
While the big wolf was ranting, Mollie and Jakob were scanning the campsite for ideas. And there, alongside one of the nipa palms leaned a pair of surf boards. Before Emil could open his mouth to apologize to the two beasts, Jakob jumped in and said, "Looks like you two big boys have surfboards."
The two wolves were stunned for a moment. Larry replied, "That's pretty obvious isn't it? My brother-in-law and I are the best surfers in all the islands. Songs are written about us. Anyhow, what business is it of yours?"
"Well," said Mollie, "it just so happens me and my brother also surf. In fact we're not too bad at it either. Probably not as good as you two but we manage to stay up on our boards most of the time."
The two wolves laughed so hard at the idea of pigs on surfboards, tears streamed down their hairy faces. "That's hilarious", said Eldon, "wait'll we tell the boys back home."
Jakob quietly said, "I've got an idea. Why don't the four of us have a little contest? Kind of a winner take all. If you win, you get to blow down our village one more time and then get to gobble us all up. And let me tell you, we're the finest tasting pigs in the whole world. If we win, though we no doubt will lose badly to a pair of great surfers like you, you get to blow our whole village down but then you have to leave without eating a one of us. Either way you get to have some fun. And if by some impossible way we win, we don't get eaten. Is it a deal?"
In one sense the contest was preposterous and the wolves knew it. Heck, they could eat all the pigs any time they wanted. Now or later, no difference at all. But a contest sounded like fun. There was no way they could lose. What the heck, if the impossible happened, the two of them could eat the pigs anyway. After all, they were the bad guys and bad guys do bad things.
Larry stuck out his paw and simply said, "Deal." All five shook on it.
So, the next time the waves were up, all of the pigs and the two wolves would meet at the beach where the waves rolled in as perfect tubes and they would have it out once and for all.
On the way back to Waimea, Emil said, "I hope you two know what you're doing but why the change of plan? You're good on the waves, but are you good enough? Personally, I doubt it and don't like the idea at all of becoming dinner at this stage in my life. These are supposed to be my golden years not my browning in the oven years. Next time, if there is a next time, will you guys please let me do the talking?"
Even back then the sun always rose and tomorrow always turned into today. And for the pigs, this tomorrow meant the waves once again grew huge. In fact they were the biggest of the year. Perfect for surfing but not so good if you happened to be a pigs.
Uncle Emil rose and climbed out of the Lund. "Uff dah. This is getting so exiting it's a shame I've got to go in and get me another cup of coffee to wet my whistle."
What the heck was he doing? This wasn't the greatest story I'd ever heard but it wasn't all that bad either. I yelled for my uncle to hurry up. He'd led me on this far and I wanted to find out what happened to the pigs. As luck would have it he'd been sidetracked and didn't return for ten minutes. Seems Aunt Lena had him pull all the Christmas decorations out of the attic before he could return. What was she thinking of? Finally, cup in hand, he returned.
"Now where was I?"
"You know darn well where you were, Uncle Emil. The pigs were up and ready to head to the beach for the big contest. C'mon, I wanna find out what happened."
"Oh yeah, the contest. I almost forgot."
Though the pigs were dark and gloomy about what was coming up, the sun was out and it looked, at least weather-wise, like it'd be another perfect day in paradise. Under most any other circumstances it would have been a wonderful day to head up the beach to have a picnic while watching Jakob and Mollie put on a show. However, no picnic for the pigs today. On the upside, they would get to see the surfing show of their lives. Lucky them, eh?
Mollie and Jakob were trying their darndest to seem upbeat. Both jabbered away about how the wolves didn't know what they were in for. However, that wasn't like them at all. They'd never, ever spoken aloud about their talent in the past. Surfing was just something they did for fun. Good for laughs and held no real meaning. But now it was different. Way different. And meant everything for all the pigs.
Larry and Eldon were at the beach waiting, surf boards in hand when the villagers arrived. And what wave riders the wolves had in their paws. Glossy black from stem to stern with bold yellow and orange lightning bolts along the toe. Nothing at all like the beat up wooden ones of Mollie and Jakob. If the wolves were anywhere near worthy of such boards, the pigs had much to fear.
"Well, well little pigs, we were wondering if you'd be brave enough to show up," said Larry. "Not that it'll do you much good. Me and Eldon are figuring on an early lunch today. Something light and sweet like the two little one's we're gonna show up out on the water. Here's the deal, we each do five rides. When Eldon and I win the first three it's all over but the cookin'. And our firewood is already stacked for the party. So, are you two little pigs ready or do you wanna give up right now?"
"No, no. We're as ready as we'll ever be," said Jakob, "Might as we'll go out and have some fun before…." Even though his shoulder was feeling better, Jakob wasn't as sure they'd win as he had the night before. But what choice did they have?
The four of them entered the water together and paddled out to the nearest surf break with the two wolves arriving first. Mollie immediately caught a fine wave and rode in on her front hoofs flawlessly. Eldon followed and did even better with a back flip thrown in, all the while laughing and calling out how hungry he was. Not good.
Wasn't much better for Jakob as Larry beat him fair and square. The wolves were up, one set to none. The pigs could almost feel the heat of the cooking fire.
For the second ride the four of them paddled out to a farther set of waves, about as far as Mollie and Jakob ever went out. Again the two stronger wolves arrived first. This time Eldon did a double back flip on his ride and again whipped Mollie, fair and square. No doubt about it, those bad boys were good. Jakob, though better than his first ride, couldn't come close as Larry spun on his head over and over while steam-rolling a perfectly formed tube. Two-zip. The wolves were laughin', jokin' and havin' themselves a fine time.
Eldon roared out, "This is too easy little pigs. Can't you two do a little better and at least make it fun for us beating you?"
Jakob and Mollie said nothing for a moment, finally Mollie piped up, "How about this time we head out to the farthest break? The one way out there where the white curl of the monster waves can barely be seen? At least that way my brother and I will have a few more minutes to live before you eat us all up."
Larry laughed, "Whatever you wish little lady. The two of us might be wolves but we're also good sports, good and hungry sports. You want to paddle way out there, it's fine with us. Time's a-wastin', let's head out."
Again the four of them paddled forth. Again the powerful wolves led the way and arrived far ahead of our heroes. But this time the result was different, for there was a reason Mollie and Jakob never paddled out to the farthest break. To head that far out in anything but a long fishing canoe was forbidden, for out there lived a strong ocean current, the strongest in the islands. Where it went none of the pigs knew. Some said to the gates of the underworld. Others said to another island far away which no pig had ever seen. Wherever the current went, that's where the two wolves were now heading and were never seen again.
By now Uncle Emil had finished his coffee. He set his cup down and said, "You know Archie me lad, to this day there are no wolves in Hawaii. Why the Hawaiians even have a name for them is a mystery to me. Anyhow, that's the end of my story. Let's you and me head in for some lunch. Lena made us ham sandwiches. Mmm, mm, sounds good doesn't it?"
Before leaving the garage I asked, "What was Mollie and Jakob's first plan, the one they told Emil on the way into the forest?"
Uncle Emil paused at the door, "That, we'll never know."
Anyhow, the other day two of my grandchildren called up to wish me a happy Veteran's Day. I have a hard time with those kind of things. Too many conflicting emotions dance around in my head and none are comprehensible to a six and eight year old. So I'm stuck with a simple 'thank you'. Actually there is something happy about being a veteran. That being I'm no longer in the Army and humping the boonies of Vietnam or having to deal with an alcoholic with stripes (except maybe in my head now and then).
Talking with Mollie and Jakob on the phone takes some effort on my part. Neither ventures much information on their own and it's up to me to either pepper them with questions or set to babbling on about whatever comes into my head. Finally, my son-in-law Ryan came to the rescue and I voiced my dilemma about Mollie and Jakob's silence. His answer was simple, "They're waiting for Uncle Emil stories", or something like that. Got me thinking and led to the idea that maybe Emil and I could sit down and spin us a yarn about my grandkids.
Back a few dozen entries Emil churned out something on Rapunzel. Not bad but could have been better, more polished. Not really his fault as he was driving and only blurted it out to pass the time on a long, long drive with a kid who was just as hard a nut to crack as the children of today. We'll see if we can do better the second time.
First off the story has to be about Jakob and Mollie. Good enough. Then off the story bounced into the world of princes and princesses. Made me nauseous and bored Uncle Emil. Today the tale drifted overseas to Hawaii. Emil thought that had potential. Next we needed animals. Animals that might have been in the islands before us white guys showed up. The choice for fairy tale animals was limited. No lions or tigers or bears in Hawaii. But we figured, why not pigs, wild pigs with big, nasty tusks? Thumbs up from Emil even though he said there wasn't a pig within a thousand miles of Hawaii before people showed up. A couple more suggestions came along from Uncle Emil but I won't let those cats out till I start to peckin' tomorrow.
Uncle Emil always said there was no need being in a hurry when you were off on an adventure or a had a tale to tell. You don't want to miss a moment of a good thing. I was nine or ten at the time and we were sitting in his red, fifteen foot Lund fishing boat with the ten horse Johnson mounted on back. You're probably thinking we were out fishing. If you are, you're wrong. In fact it was the dead of winter in the north land. Up in St. Bruno, Minnesota, winter means knee-deep snow, below zero temperatures and a howling wind out of the northwest. Emil said the wind smelled like Alaska with a whiff of Canada thrown in for good measure. Had we actually been fishing we'd have been out on the lake peering down a hole in the ice hoping we'd catch something quick so we could run off to someplace warm. Like maybe Wessel's Tap in downtown Parkers Prairie. There, my uncle would sip a couple of Grain Belt's and get me a coke with a fistful of cherries thrown in.
No, at the moment we were in his garage. He and my Aunt Lena live in a small, single story, stucco and brick house just outside of town. The house may have been small but not the garage. In fact it was closer in size to a small barn. Half held their two cars. The remainder was Emil's workshop. In the winter months his shop shared its space with his boat 'Silent but Deadly'. Though it was bitter cold outside, in the workshop it was somewhat tolerable for he'd built a cement block fireplace and had it stoked up and glowing.
In his shop Uncle Emil built everything from birdhouses to dining room tables. "I do my best to build things as good as a craftsmen but usually fall a few yards short. My Danish Modern tends to border on rustic. Ah well, at least it looks pretty. Mark my words it'll be worth a lot of money someday as what they call Folk Art. Truth is, it doesn't much matter since I give it all away."
Earlier in the month he and my Aunt Lena had returned from two weeks in Hawaii. It wasn't their first trip to the islands and wouldn't be their last. To them Hawaii felt like a home away from home. "It's got woods and water just like Minnesota. Can't go wrong with that combination. Also has mountains, good food, smells nice and eighty above in January isn't near as bad for your soul as most Minnesotans would think."
On the plane ride back, Emil had plenty of time to kick around the back corners of his brain to see what he could find. As he put it, "While mullin' things over, I tripped over a mental rock 'cause I was wearin' a fancy pair of high heeled cowboy boots. Not a smart thing to have on your feet when traipsin' through an imaginary rain forest. Anyhow, while I was layin' there feeling pretty darn foolish, this story jumped on me out of nowhere and wouldn't let loose till I heard it out. So that's how the story of 'The Hawaiian Pigs' came about. You may like it and then again, you might think it's whole lot of malarkey. Remember, I didn't make it up, so it's not my fault if it smells a bit overcooked here and there. Lucky for me I had a couple of books with me on Hawaiian language so I didn't have to fake names of places. There's a whole world of difference between fake and fiction. When you go to spinning a yarn, keep it as real as you can."
Before climbing in the Lund, Emil walked over to the rack where he stored his fishing gear. "Couple of times every week I head into the workshop just to wiggle a rod or two. Let's me remember the bend of a fish on the line. Helps to get me through the months of ice."
At least a dozen rods filled the rack. All were the white of Shakespeare. "Don't go in for the real fancy rods. These Shakespeare rods seem a better fit in the hand of a man who swings a hammer now and then."
But that wasn't what he was after. Alongside the rack sat a tall, narrow, oak cabinet. From a drawer Uncle Emil pulled a wooden cigar box, "Got this box from a cigar shop in Miami for a quarter. She's not fancy but does the job just right." Inside was a pack of Lucky Strike cigarettes and a Zippo lighter. He pulled a single smoke and we climbed up into the boat.
Emil packed his lone Lucky on the Zippo, fired up it up and while he smoked said, "Had this lighter on me when I was shot in the Philippines. We were clearin' out the last of the Japanese resistance a few months before the end of the war. The area we were patrolling was a known hot spot and we were expecting to get hit. Anyhow, the bullet went in here (pointed to his left shoulder) and came out here (right side of his neck). Next thing I recall I was in the hospital. Long, long time ago. I keep the lighter to remind me how good I've had it ever since."
" 'Bout the only time I smoke these days is when I'm in a boat. A pack'll last me into spring. A carton, a year or more."
"So, while Lena and I were flying back from Honolulu the story of the Hawaiian pigs came calling more than once. And I set to ruminating over it like a cow. Chewed it up, swallowed it down, let it sit for a while then'd pull the cud up again to chew on it some more. Archie me lad, you ever pass this story on, feel free to change any of the names you want. Anyhow, here she goes."
The Hawaiian Pigs
A long, long time ago, way before people landed in the Hawaiian Islands, back in the days when animals walked on their hind legs just like in Walt Disney cartoons, there lived a race of pigs on Oahu, the island that's home to Honolulu these days. Odd thing was, those pigs spoke Hawaiian even before the Hawaiians spoke Hawaiian and they called themselves the Pua'a, which as you may or may not know, means pig. Me, I have a hard time sayin' words in Hawaiian. So, from now on I'll give you a name in Hawaiian then stick with the English if that's okay with you? Life was good for those pigs. Not only did they get to eat slop like pigs do today but even got to eat stuff before it was one step from the trash can. You see, food was growing everywhere, the pigs were good cooks and the weather was fine, in fact it was the best on the planet. Air was clean, so was the water. The pigs had figured out surfing and when the waves were up, they spent their time at the beach. Not a worry in the world.
Up on the north shore of Oahu there's a bay by the name of Waimea. Big waves crash in that bay all winter long and not far away, up the beach a little, was some of the best surfing in the world. Not only some but all of the best in the world seein' as how the Pigs were the only ones who'd figured out how to ride a board and hang four. They'd have hung ten like the surfers in California but were short a few toes.
The pigs this story's about lived in a kind of village, they called it an ahupua'a and gave it the name of Waimea, just like the bay and the deep valley behind it. Where the valley ended at the big waterfall, it rose up into the mountains surrounding it on three sides. In those mountains the forest grew tall and dark, dark as the bottom of a coal miner's boot in the middle of moonless night. Spooky as all get out. It was said ghosts wandered those woods. All the pigs were just a little bit nervous whenever they climbed into the mountains. As a result, they tended to stay down below as much as they could. Did I say they hadn't a worry in the world? Guess I was wrong.
On all the north shore of the island the two best surfers were Moli Malia (Mollie Marie)Pua'a and her brother Iakopa Dini (Jakob Dean) Pua'a. In fact, all the villagers had the last name of Pua'a. Heck, they were pigs and none to creative. Seein' as how there were only a couple of dozen Pua'a in the whole village there really wasn't any need for last names. So, from this point on we'll stick with first names only. Okay?
When the big waves of winter thundered in, Jakob and Mollie rode only the tallest, meanest and toughest. Ordinary ten footers just weren't fun enough. When they were looking to simply goof around with their friends, they'd head up the beach to a spot where the waves rolled in as near perfect tubes. On those days the entire village would turn out to watch their feats. None but Mollie and Jakob were brave enough to paddle far from the shore to the place where they caught the largest of the sets. Then, with shouts of encouragement from the crowd, Mollie would ride in doing a one hoofed, foreleg stand till the wave closed out and crashed behind her in an explosion of foam. Not to be outdone, Jakob would ride the next while standing on his head. Not bad for a couple of very young pigs. My brother Ed raises pigs and I've never seen a one of them do anything more challenging then fit a head of lettuce and two apples into its mouth at the same time.
It was on one of those winter days while the entire village was out watching Mollie and Jakob, that it happened. Somehow, someway, every hut and storage building in Waimea had been knocked down and scattered everywhere. Seeing as how the dozen houses in the village were all made of grass, rebuilding only took a few days. But the cause was a mystery to everyone. The little village had been destroyed several times before but each was the result of a hurricane. This time the weather had been beautiful. Blue skies with puffy white clouds out on the ocean and the gentlest of breezes to cool the villagers when out in the sunlight. Certainly not the type of day to cause such destruction.
A meeting was called to discuss the issue and what to do about it. Some said it was the ghosts of the forest 'cause no one was paying enough attention to them. Other's said it was the gods getting even 'cause the last tribute offered them wasn't but a bunch of over ripe, almost mushy bananas.
Uncle Emil paused, "Speaking of too ripe, did I ever tell you about the idea I had to make cat food out of real mice and birds. Made sense to me seein' as how that's what cats seem to like when they're out on their own. So I made me up a batch and the barn cats over at Ed's sure seemed to like it a lot. It was Lena who put the kibosh on the deal. Said the mix smelled a little on the awful side. Had to admit she was right as I had to wear a gas mask when I mixed the mess together."
Where was I? Whatever the reason, it was agreed the next time the village headed up the beach, a guard would be left behind to see if the blowdown happened again and find out the cause. Kind of a scary job if you ask me. A volunteer was asked for. No one stepped forward so Pelekinako (Ferdinand) was chosen seein' as how he was the only one who hadn't shown up. There's a lesson to be learned there.
Ferdinand was a interesting choice and wasn't happy about having to face whatever it was he was going to have to face. Out of all the Pigs he was the strongest. And the gentlest. And the laziest. Whenever the time came to build a new fishing canoe he was always off somewhere else. Usually he'd be found under his favorite banyan tree where he liked to sit and smell the plumeria and hibiscus flowers. Got him out of a lot of work and, in this case, got him in a tight spot.
'Bout a week went by before the waves were just right for Jakob and Mollie to frolic in the surf once again. Most everyone pitched in to cook up a big picnic lunch and then they headed up the beach. All but Ferdinand that is. Yup, he was left behind to face the ghosts or the gods.
As usual everyone had a good time under blue skies and puffy white clouds. Mollie and Jakob were better than ever and the food was wonderful. However, much to their dismay, when they returned at the end of the day, the village was once again in shambles. And they were none the wiser as to what had happened 'cause Ferdinand was nowhere in sight. Fears that he'd been carried off by the ghosts or banished to the underworld by the gods flew rampant through the villagers. However, a search of the area found him under his favorite banyan tree, sound asleep and covered in flowers. Guess they chose the wrong pua'a, eh?
What to do? What to do? Two small time tragedies and not a clue as to what was going on. The Pigs searched everywhere for clues or footprints but, who or whatever it was, left none. For sure ghosts and gods wouldn't and that had all the Pigs shook up. Once again a volunteer was called for and this time the oldest, most shriveled up pig of them all, the old geezer Emela (Emil - funny how those things work out) stepped forward.
"Yup, this time you've got yourself one top notch, won't miss a thing, guard for this pile of straw. Next time the kids decide to head up the beach and show off, you guys go and have yourselves a good time. Not a thing to worry about back here. Odds are I'll not only find out who's making a misery of our huts but I'll solve the situation once and for all."
That Emil was one cocksure little bugger wasn't he? But he'd been a good worker all his life and usually had a fix that'd work whenever a problem popped up, so everyone was relieved.
For the next two weeks things again returned to normal. Unless, of course, you decided to get up in the middle of the night to relieve yourself. Long about three in the morning, if the riser listened just right, he or she could hear a grumbling, rumbling, growling sort of noise high above in the forest. They'd never heard anything like that before and a visit outside in the dark of the night became an act of courage. Most figured whatever was making that noise was also tearing down the village. Well, makes sense doesn't it?
It was nearing spring when some of the last big waves paid a visit. Though few of the villagers, including Jakob and Mollie, were in the mood to party, once again a feast was prepared and the day spent up the beach. Mollie and Jakob headed out in the surf as usual but their hearts just weren't in doing what they did best. Jakob even fell and cut his shoulder on the sharp reef beneath the curling waves. In short, no one had a good time and instead, stood around worrying about what might be happening back home.
The sun was near to setting when they returned. Once again the village was in shambles but this time Emil had seen everything, " Never seen anything like it before. Don't even know what they were. Big, hairy animals with long snouts, pointy teeth from one end of their mouths to the other and beady, little red eyes. So red they looked like they were on fire. Wasn't but two of the creatures that came running in on all fours. When they got inside the village, both stood up and commenced to destroying everything around them, all the while laughing and yelling stuff like 'Little pigs, little pigs, next time we come we'll eat you up.' but the oddest thing of all was how they knocked down our houses. They simply stood up tall as they could, sucked in an ocean of air and blew the huts down, one at a time."
"While this was going on I was hiding behind a cluster of coconut palms over by the beach. I'd gone out for a quick swim and was drying myself in the sun when the two of them stormed in. Yeah, I was scared alright, right down to my chops. No way was I running in there to try and stop them."
"About the time the last of the storage huts was going down, the shorter of the two stopped, stuck its snout in the air and said, 'Oh Elonu (that's Eldon in case you're wondering) stop a minute. Do you smell what I smell?' So Eldon stopped, stuck his nose up and replied, 'If you're smelling piggies Lali (that's Larry of course), then I'm right with you. Let's us go and find that piggy and maybe have us a little lunch, mmmmm, mmm.'
" Well, they found me all right. Lucky for them I wasn't in the mood to fight or the two of them would already be laid out as rugs. Instead, I figured it best to work out a deal. Wasn't easy since I was crying a lot 'cause I felt bad about not beating the tar out of the two of them. Anyhow, we agreed they'd consider not eating us all at the same time if we followed their instructions to a T. Guess they didn't trust me 'cause they wrote a message on my body."
The villagers looked Emil up and down but saw nary a word till he turned around and bent over. There on his little piggy backside was written the message:
TOMORROW NIGHT AS THE MOON RISES HIGHER
SEND US THREE PLUMP PIGGIES TO ROAST OVER OUR FIRE
THE 'ILIO HAE (wolves)
Wolves? What the heck are wolves asked all the pigs at once? I suppose the truth is, names don't always matter a lot. In a situation like this where everyone you knew could end up on someone else's table for Sunday dinner, it didn't matter a whit what the diners called themselves. What mattered at the moment was what to do about it. A brief discussion led to the decision to roll up in mats for the night and sleep on it. Maybe in the morning one of the pigs would come up with an idea that would save everyone's hides.
The sun rose in the morning as it always does. So did the villagers. While they ate their breakfast of breadfruit, poi and coconuts while sitting in the sand, the pigs talked over their dilemma. Seemed none had any fateful dreams in the night and had not a clue what to do. But not so Mollie and Jakob. Actually, their plan had nothing to do with a dream. While the others had been snoring away as only pigs can snore, the two of them had whispered together far into the night. Not only whispered but actually hatched an idea. They knew what they hoped to do was risky. Might even cost them everything. On the other hand, it might save all of the pigs. They figured it was worth a try.
It was Jakob who popped their plan to the village. Well, not all of the plan. Just enough to get the rest of the villagers off the hook. Not a one of them wanted to climb out of the valley in the middle of the night even if there wasn't a single wolf for a million miles. Who could blame them? It was dark up there and maybe filled with ghosts. So when our two heroes volunteered, a sigh of relief could be heard all the way out to Kaena Point.
"Mollie and I will go. We have an idea that might save the village. But, according to the note on Emil, we need one more volunteer. Someone brave, someone wise, someone all the world is in love with. Someone with a note written on his bottom."
That's how Emil found himself with our young heroes in the dark and climbing the steep cliff alongside the waterfall at the head of Waimea Valley. Thankfully the full moon had risen over the mountains and made the foot and hand holds easy to see. To say Emil was unhappy would be a grave understatement. He was unhappy to the point of being furious, furious to the point of becoming intelligent, and intelligent to the point of becoming wise. Finally, he'd become wise enough to know it was he who would have to do the talking.
Mollie and Jakob had told him of their plan as the three passed out of earshot from the village. Emil listened then said, "I have to tell you two kids that's the most hair-brained idea I've ever heard. In fact it's so crazy that, with a whole lot of luck, it just might work. Remember, you two have to keep your pie holes shut unless I ask you to talk. Agreed?" But the other two said nothing in return.
Not long after they'd scaled the cliff our heroes stumbled on the wolves. The pair was relaxing in hammocks they'd strung in a grove of nipa palms. When they saw the three pigs coming the two jumped out of their beds and Eldon started yelling, "What in the Sam Hill are you three losers doing up here! We wanted plump piggies not two skinny kids and a wrinkled old geezer. What kind of meal are you going to make? We're hungry, really hungry. Burns a lot of calories blowing down a village, even a cruddy little one like yours."
While the big wolf was ranting, Mollie and Jakob were scanning the campsite for ideas. And there, alongside one of the nipa palms leaned a pair of surf boards. Before Emil could open his mouth to apologize to the two beasts, Jakob jumped in and said, "Looks like you two big boys have surfboards."
The two wolves were stunned for a moment. Larry replied, "That's pretty obvious isn't it? My brother-in-law and I are the best surfers in all the islands. Songs are written about us. Anyhow, what business is it of yours?"
"Well," said Mollie, "it just so happens me and my brother also surf. In fact we're not too bad at it either. Probably not as good as you two but we manage to stay up on our boards most of the time."
The two wolves laughed so hard at the idea of pigs on surfboards, tears streamed down their hairy faces. "That's hilarious", said Eldon, "wait'll we tell the boys back home."
Jakob quietly said, "I've got an idea. Why don't the four of us have a little contest? Kind of a winner take all. If you win, you get to blow down our village one more time and then get to gobble us all up. And let me tell you, we're the finest tasting pigs in the whole world. If we win, though we no doubt will lose badly to a pair of great surfers like you, you get to blow our whole village down but then you have to leave without eating a one of us. Either way you get to have some fun. And if by some impossible way we win, we don't get eaten. Is it a deal?"
In one sense the contest was preposterous and the wolves knew it. Heck, they could eat all the pigs any time they wanted. Now or later, no difference at all. But a contest sounded like fun. There was no way they could lose. What the heck, if the impossible happened, the two of them could eat the pigs anyway. After all, they were the bad guys and bad guys do bad things.
Larry stuck out his paw and simply said, "Deal." All five shook on it.
So, the next time the waves were up, all of the pigs and the two wolves would meet at the beach where the waves rolled in as perfect tubes and they would have it out once and for all.
On the way back to Waimea, Emil said, "I hope you two know what you're doing but why the change of plan? You're good on the waves, but are you good enough? Personally, I doubt it and don't like the idea at all of becoming dinner at this stage in my life. These are supposed to be my golden years not my browning in the oven years. Next time, if there is a next time, will you guys please let me do the talking?"
Even back then the sun always rose and tomorrow always turned into today. And for the pigs, this tomorrow meant the waves once again grew huge. In fact they were the biggest of the year. Perfect for surfing but not so good if you happened to be a pigs.
Uncle Emil rose and climbed out of the Lund. "Uff dah. This is getting so exiting it's a shame I've got to go in and get me another cup of coffee to wet my whistle."
What the heck was he doing? This wasn't the greatest story I'd ever heard but it wasn't all that bad either. I yelled for my uncle to hurry up. He'd led me on this far and I wanted to find out what happened to the pigs. As luck would have it he'd been sidetracked and didn't return for ten minutes. Seems Aunt Lena had him pull all the Christmas decorations out of the attic before he could return. What was she thinking of? Finally, cup in hand, he returned.
"Now where was I?"
"You know darn well where you were, Uncle Emil. The pigs were up and ready to head to the beach for the big contest. C'mon, I wanna find out what happened."
"Oh yeah, the contest. I almost forgot."
Though the pigs were dark and gloomy about what was coming up, the sun was out and it looked, at least weather-wise, like it'd be another perfect day in paradise. Under most any other circumstances it would have been a wonderful day to head up the beach to have a picnic while watching Jakob and Mollie put on a show. However, no picnic for the pigs today. On the upside, they would get to see the surfing show of their lives. Lucky them, eh?
Mollie and Jakob were trying their darndest to seem upbeat. Both jabbered away about how the wolves didn't know what they were in for. However, that wasn't like them at all. They'd never, ever spoken aloud about their talent in the past. Surfing was just something they did for fun. Good for laughs and held no real meaning. But now it was different. Way different. And meant everything for all the pigs.
Larry and Eldon were at the beach waiting, surf boards in hand when the villagers arrived. And what wave riders the wolves had in their paws. Glossy black from stem to stern with bold yellow and orange lightning bolts along the toe. Nothing at all like the beat up wooden ones of Mollie and Jakob. If the wolves were anywhere near worthy of such boards, the pigs had much to fear.
"Well, well little pigs, we were wondering if you'd be brave enough to show up," said Larry. "Not that it'll do you much good. Me and Eldon are figuring on an early lunch today. Something light and sweet like the two little one's we're gonna show up out on the water. Here's the deal, we each do five rides. When Eldon and I win the first three it's all over but the cookin'. And our firewood is already stacked for the party. So, are you two little pigs ready or do you wanna give up right now?"
"No, no. We're as ready as we'll ever be," said Jakob, "Might as we'll go out and have some fun before…." Even though his shoulder was feeling better, Jakob wasn't as sure they'd win as he had the night before. But what choice did they have?
The four of them entered the water together and paddled out to the nearest surf break with the two wolves arriving first. Mollie immediately caught a fine wave and rode in on her front hoofs flawlessly. Eldon followed and did even better with a back flip thrown in, all the while laughing and calling out how hungry he was. Not good.
Wasn't much better for Jakob as Larry beat him fair and square. The wolves were up, one set to none. The pigs could almost feel the heat of the cooking fire.
For the second ride the four of them paddled out to a farther set of waves, about as far as Mollie and Jakob ever went out. Again the two stronger wolves arrived first. This time Eldon did a double back flip on his ride and again whipped Mollie, fair and square. No doubt about it, those bad boys were good. Jakob, though better than his first ride, couldn't come close as Larry spun on his head over and over while steam-rolling a perfectly formed tube. Two-zip. The wolves were laughin', jokin' and havin' themselves a fine time.
Eldon roared out, "This is too easy little pigs. Can't you two do a little better and at least make it fun for us beating you?"
Jakob and Mollie said nothing for a moment, finally Mollie piped up, "How about this time we head out to the farthest break? The one way out there where the white curl of the monster waves can barely be seen? At least that way my brother and I will have a few more minutes to live before you eat us all up."
Larry laughed, "Whatever you wish little lady. The two of us might be wolves but we're also good sports, good and hungry sports. You want to paddle way out there, it's fine with us. Time's a-wastin', let's head out."
Again the four of them paddled forth. Again the powerful wolves led the way and arrived far ahead of our heroes. But this time the result was different, for there was a reason Mollie and Jakob never paddled out to the farthest break. To head that far out in anything but a long fishing canoe was forbidden, for out there lived a strong ocean current, the strongest in the islands. Where it went none of the pigs knew. Some said to the gates of the underworld. Others said to another island far away which no pig had ever seen. Wherever the current went, that's where the two wolves were now heading and were never seen again.
By now Uncle Emil had finished his coffee. He set his cup down and said, "You know Archie me lad, to this day there are no wolves in Hawaii. Why the Hawaiians even have a name for them is a mystery to me. Anyhow, that's the end of my story. Let's you and me head in for some lunch. Lena made us ham sandwiches. Mmm, mm, sounds good doesn't it?"
Before leaving the garage I asked, "What was Mollie and Jakob's first plan, the one they told Emil on the way into the forest?"
Uncle Emil paused at the door, "That, we'll never know."
Monday, November 17, 2014
Still at it
Maybe a blog book for my grandkids. That's the ticket. I'm slowly going through my fourth proof reading and revision. Not many changes this time. Its either getting cleaned up or I'm continuing to blindly fool myself.
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